


"that's the kind of heart break"

by orphan_account



Series: meet me in the afterglow [1]
Category: AB6IX (Band), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: M/M, Side Park Woojin & Jeon Woong, kind of Cinderella AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:41:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23057152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Perhaps, this is the worst kind of heart break Park Jihoon is going to experience all his life.
Relationships: Park Jihoon & Park Woojin, Park Jihoon/Park Woojin
Series: meet me in the afterglow [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1657054
Comments: 11
Kudos: 49





	"that's the kind of heart break"

**Author's Note:**

> hi so i finally was able to finish this fic I was trying to write since 2019, i dropped this so many times, changed characters and such but it had to end up as 2park that's it.
> 
> title is taken by taylor swift's cornelia street (even the last line of this fic). i kind of want to write again based on taylor swift's last album 'lover' bc wHY THE FREAK not, right?
> 
> but only if you allow me too (i hope to write a woong x jihoon too because I'M REACHING LMAO) i'm going to base my next 2park fics on taylor swift's lover album wOHOO
> 
> I hope you let me. Please enjoy and it is totally not beta-ed so forgive for my mistakes
> 
> P.S  
> 👞👞 indicates an explicit sex so skip if not comfortable

_Not all I love you equates a love story_.

This self-reminder of Park Jihoon becomes like a mantra to himself every single time his mind and heart drift off to the possibility of being with Park Woojin, his best friend since prom night, at the very slightest.

It’s unorthodox, that’s how Jihoon would consider it. Not when they both are infinitely different. Jihoon likes the smell of books and coffee shops and enjoys the comfortable silence that comes along it whereas Woojin enjoys the loud music and the dances.

How he and Woojin met is quite ironic, even for him as his mind wanders off when he sees the younger, Park Woojin in his perfect red velvet suit, his red hair perfectly styled to compliment and outline how dashing he looks especially today. 

Everything flashes right through him and he feels the world stop at the exact moment Woojin waves at him, left hand up in the air, sporting that all too familiar eye smile, who is followed by someone he knows dearly that Jihoon has loved all along all his life.

👞

The start goes on like this:

Jihoon hated, still hates, the idea of party but Bae Jinyoung, that sneaky little shit convinces him to attend their senior prom night because you’re graduating, hyung, don’t be a downer, only to ditch him ten minutes later after seeing Lee Daehwi, a kid Jinyoung has been pining over since they were in kindergarten.

He huffs in annoyance and decides that spending forty minutes (not like he’s counting) is already enough and 12 o’clock in the midnight is already late so he dashes down the stairs until he is at the last plight of the stair that his shoe decides to give up on him, making him tumble down the ground.

He looks back at the offending and now lonely sole of his left shoe, completely off, staring back like his left foot isn’t bare now. Oh my fucking god.

Jihoon is about to throw off a speech when he hears a sudden chuckle and he whips his head, only to see the Park Woojin in his red suit complimenting his red hair.

“You okay, there?” Woojin asks in between his chuckles.

Jihoon can’t help but scoff and tries to play with his left foot. “Perfect, I must say.” He walks to his now separated sole and grimaces at it. “Guess I gotta be barefoot, huh.”

Woojin smiles at him and even though he’s known the other since middle school, he and Woojin are never in the same group. And now he completely understands why girls and boys alike flock onto him. There’s something homely the way he smiles compared to when he’s all serious. There’s something comforting about seeing Woojin as to more than just a prankster.

“Are you sure though?” Woojin eyes him warily and remembers why Woojin is reluctant. There was a fight earlier because of the “date” they were supposed to bring. It turned out the girl was two-timing them.

Jihoon heaves a sigh. “I’ll be peachy, don’t worry your pretty little head.”

Woojin smiles again and there is something oddly attractive about how the way there are thin wrinkles near his eyes plus the fact that he has a snaggletooth.

And it’s not like Jihoon is affected by that no, sir, no.

Then Jihoon realizes that Woojin (yes, ladies and gents, The Park Woojin) is kneeling in front of him.

“Cinderella, hop on and let us find your way back home.”

Jihoon clenches his fist and Woojin finds himself in another fit of laughter.

“What? It’s midnight and you’re missing a shoe so yes Cinderella is very fitting for you at the moment. Come now, your carriage awaits you.”

Jihoon rolls his eyes and decides that he doesn’t want Woojin to look like a fool if another student comes down so climbs on his back, rounding his arms around his neck and if this ain’t a fairytale kind of scenario, he doesn’t know what is.

“I’m Jihoon, by the way.” He informs him.

Woojin shrugs and says, “I think I like Cinderella better.”

All he remembers is that Woojin smells like a strong scent of sweet strawberries. Suddenly, Jihoon doesn’t seem to want to let go.

👞

The story continues like this:

Jihoon’s phone rings and he can’t help but to suppress a sigh. After that night, he and Woojin have become the best buddies, the kind of buddies where they playfully banter and throw insults but at the same time always having each other’s backs. Time passes by before he knows that he’s also fallen in love with the same guy who becomes his one night knight-in-shining armor.

“What.” Jihoon deadpans.

He hears a loud and dramatic offended gasp at the end line. “What’s gotten into your pants, Cinderella?”

“Shut up. What do you want?”

There’s a pause and Jihoon scrambles with his words. “Woojin? Park Woojin?”

He remembers that today is Friday and Fridays meant boyfriends time, in Woojin’s case that means with Jeon Woong, the guy he’s met in their second year college. The same guy that Woojin has been dating for the last five years of his life.

The same guy who unintentionally broke Jihoon’s heart.

“Woojin?” He calls out again, although this time with no bite in his tone.

“Can’t I call my bestest buddy in this universe? I haven’t hang with you for so long so I just want to ask if you’re free.” There’s a little hesitancy in Woojin’s voice that only comes out when he’s feeling unsure of himself. Jihoon knows this. Jihoon has heard this so many times before.

Woojin sighs. “I have chicken. And beer.”

Who is Jihoon to say no to that?

👞

  
Park Jihoon finds himself knocking on Woojin’s door and the younger opens it wide arms and smile and Jihoon peeks behind him. 

It’s a full gourmet meal, Jihoon realizes, as they sit on around the table. Woojin must have spent time decorating everything. From the roses and candles (no matter how old-fashioned it is) scattering on the floor and the way the chicken and seafood all smell delicious, he knows Woojin has exerted effort.

“If it weren’t for the fact that all of this were not for Woong hyung, I would have thought you were courting me.” He teases lightly.

Glaring, Woojin flicks his forehead. “You wish.”

And boy, Jihoon really does, he isn’t sure if Woojin realizes how much Jihoon would do everything for that. Because no matter what, he can’t find in himself to hate Jeon Woong.

Woong who has been nothing but wonderful to him. Woong who has been all smiles and understanding on his friendship with Park Woojin.

Instead, Jihoon is just thankful for finding a friendship in them.

“So what’s the special occasion?” He inquires.

Woojin drinks his beer and answers, “You know it’s our anniversary.”

“Where’s Woongie hyung then?”

“Says he’s still busy at work. I can’t let all of these go down to waste so I call my wonderful best friend.” There’s sadness in Woojin’s eyes no matter how he tries really hard to be okay.

Jihoon wants to pry but decides against it. “I can’t believe I’m the second choice.”

Woojin glances at him and ruffles his hair. “No, you’re not.”

The underlying meaning of those three words almost flip something in his stomach. It’s not supposed to be there --- to happen but boy, it does. 

“You know that you’ll never be the second choice.” Woojin whispers and Jihoon tries not to ask him to repeat what he’s saying. Rather, he distracts his thoughts by munching chicken loudly until he coughs.

  
Woojin, the ever caring best of friend, runs to the kitchen and gives him a cup of water which he drinks as fast as he can. After that, Woojin laughs at his face and Jihoon wants to laugh, too, but he wants to just kiss him all the same way.

  
“I mean, you deserve to be the only choice, Jihoon.” He continues and boy does it make Jihoon’s heart out of his ribcage.

Jihoon feigns ignorance with the way there’s lovely pink blush on his cheeks (he’d blame it on the spicy chicken or the beer, it’s easier like that than anything). “So what happened to you and Woongie hyung?”

Woojin gulps another beer and says, “Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing.” Woojin repeats again, more like he’s convincing himself instead of Jihoon. “And I guess, that’s just it.”

There’s a little crack that Jihoon hears from the younger’s admittance. Woojin is all but down. He’s all pranks and smiles and happiness and confidence, not the way the other is trying to make himself look smaller with his arms wrapped around himself. Woojin looks like he’s guarding himself from something Jihoon cannot quite comprehend.

Jihoon bites his lips, looking for the perfect words to comfort his words but soon as he turns around, Woojin puts his head on his shoulders with a smile that he knows that is going to haunt him this night.

“You have the best lips, you know?” Woojin says.

Jihoon wants to retort back --- because what he feels for the other gets crazier and crazier with every word coming out of the other’s mouth and it needs to stop.

Before Jihoon says something back, Woojin sighs and admits, “I think --- Woong hyung has fallen out of love with me.”

  
👞

  
The trigger comes out like this:

  
Jihoon has always dreamed of actually getting his own surprise, who doesn’t, especially when he sees Woojin’s own restaurant turns into a beautiful and private occasion event.

Today is Woong hyung’s birthday and Woojin is making sure that everything is set, from Woong hyung’s favorite red roses and bright yellow sunflowers scattered all over the carpeted floor to all Woong hyung’s favorite food (not too spicy, a little lame, Jihoon knows) that the younger personally prepared, to the chocolate cake that Woojin ordered from the other’s favorite pastry shop, down to all the balloons and greeting plastered all over, even to all their friends, Daehwi, Youngmin hyung, Donghyun hyung --- everything is settled.

There’s something warming about the thought of someone giving all their heart and effort into something like this. Jihoon wishes that one day it’s going to happen to it, as well.

The thought of Woojin doing this for him --- he shakes the mere thought away and watches the other not staying still, fidgeting all over his place.

“Can you like --- stop moving?” Daehwi chastises his best friend and he can’t help but laugh.

Because Woojin looks like he’s going through diarrhea that he happened to witness, by accident, during their second year in high school. All pale and all sweaty.

“You look like you’re about to propose that’s why you can’t stay still.” He hears Youngmin say.

A pin drop silence clouds them all when Woojin freezes on his ground. Jihoon perks his ears when the other opens and closes his mouth and he hopes he denies it. He wishes (at the back of his mind) that Woojin is not thinking that right now.

“Oh god.” Donghyun breaks the tension and claps Woojin on his back. “You truly are!”

Woojin clears his throat and Jihoon picks up the pieces of his heart.

👞

  
The door clings and there goes Jeon Woong in all his glory. Mouth wide agape, Woong eyes each corner of the restaurant full of Park Woojin’s love and effort.

“Happy Birthday!” They greet and Jihoon claps like an autopilot.

  
Woojin reaches the other with the bright yellow sunflowers in his hands. He remembers once the younger telling him that Woong hyung reminds him of the said flowers.

_“Why so?” His eyebrows raised as his fingers run through the console game he’s holding._

_Woojin attacks and smirks. “It’s how Woongie hyung smiles. All bright and cheerful and it reminds me of how after a long day, just a smile can brighten me up.”_

_Jihoon’s finger freezes. He’s never heard Woojin describing someone that way in the past years they’ve known each other. He’s too unromantic, Jihoon thinks. But then a certain brown haired medical boy comes, and the younger is sprouting romantic bullshits._

_Jihoon can see it in his eyes when he glances on his left side. The way Woojin’s eyes sparkle and how it is leaving him an open hole in his heart._

_His character dies and he hears Woojin celebrating wistfully._

  
“Happy birthday, love.” Woojin’s voice cuts through his reverie and Woong takes the bouquet albeit hesitantly. 

They sing him a birthday song as they walk to them. Each giving a gift to the birthday boy, Jihoon giving his as the last person in line. He’s happy. Woojin is happy. Woong is happy.

_Right?_

“Now, it’s my turn.” Woojin claps his hands and announces. Woong, in his medical gown turns to him with questioning brows.

_Don’t_ , he wants to say.

Would that make him a bad best friend?

_Don’t do it._

But Woojin is kneeling down in front of the other, taking a velvet box out of his breast pocket. His hands shake as he opens and reveals a diamond ring in it.

“We’ve been together for a long time, right, Hyung? I---” He exhales loudly, earning laughtet from the others. Jihoon is not sure why he’s feeling a little nervous for this. “I think we need to take it to another level.”

“Woojin---” Woong calls softly.

“After so many years, I cannot imagine a life without you, Sunshine. Will you marry a fool in love with you?” He finally asks.

Woong avoids his eyes and looks up. They wait in bathed breath as Woong stands, hands hanging limply on his sides.

_Why._

“I---” Woong says and Jihoon is so confused right now. Take it, he wants to scream. Take it, because Woojin looks like his world is about to collapse and Jihoon can’t have that. “I--- I know I’m the worst person right now but I’m sorry.” The tears on the doctor’s face are falling. “I can’t take it. It’s been good being with you. You’re perfect, Woojinie, and this is just me. It’s all in me. Never you. I’m sorry.”

_Fuck_.

Woong bows to Woojin, cupping his cheeks with his hands then turns to him that makes him shell shocked.

“I know I promised you not to hurt him. But --- I know this is the best for us. I’m sorry, Jihoon.” He says and runs out of the restaurant.

Woojin falls on the ground. Jihoon’s heart falls, as well. He’s not sure how he can pick up both his and Woojin’s hearts back into pieces.

  
👞

“That’s bullshit, and I know it.” Woojin’s voice echoes in the restaurant, holding a glass of soju in his right and a bottle in his left. “Hell, you all know it!”

“Woojin---”

Woojin looks at them, tie loose, hair messy, eyes red and puffy and with a sad smile, he says. “It’s been a day, I guess. You can go home now.”

“But hyung ---” Daehwi protests which earns him a glare from the tanned man. 

“I’m not killing myself, don’t worry.” He puts down his glass to ruffle the youngest’s hair. “I just want to be by myself tonight.”

“Will you call?” There’s worry in Donghyun’s voice when he asks.

Woojin nods. “After I get home, I promise you.”

“Are you sure?” Youngmin eyes him.

Another nod. “Very positive. See you tomorrow!” He waves at them.

Jihoon wants to open his mouth. He wants to run his fingers through the younger’s now messy hair. He wants to pat him, to reach out to him, to hold him yet the uncertainties hanging in the air is eating him alive. 

And Woojin knows him by heart as he offers him a tap on his shoulder instead. “Go. I’d be fine.”

Jihoon wants to argue and fights back but it’s a lost case now especially the younger has turned around to drown himself and Jihoon hates the silence that cuts through right after.

Woojin deserves better. Woojin deserves the best.

  
👞

  
The conflict comes like this:

  
Knocks are heard, echoing on the floor where Jihoon resides in. The knocks are soft and can barely be heard but sleep hasn’t found Jihoon that night so he finds himself crossing the space from his bedroom to the door and surprise overwhelms him.

“Care for a night, Cinderella?” Woojin says in lieu of his greeting.

He reeks of alcohol and he wrinkles his nose in disgust so he just eyes him warily.

The other shrugs his shoulders and waves the plastic bags in front of him. “I’ve got some chicken and beer with me.”

Jihoon steps aside.

Woojin comes in and sighs, “I knew I could buy you with chicken, Cinderella. Too easy.”

They settle in the living room’s floor with a muted TV on. Park Woojin is settled beside him, a little too close for Jihoon’s comfort. He’s not sure if he needs to move or if he needs to wrap his arms around him so he decides to chug down his beer.

“Calm the fuck down, Cinderella.” Woojin comments. “You’re not the one whose proposal was a failure. You’re not the one who got his heart broken.”.

Jihoon begs to differ because every time he’s with his best friend, his heart feels like it is being pricked by a needle. It’s tiny but it brings more and more pain for him.

“Perhaps, I really discredited Woong hyung all this time.” Jihoon perks up and turns to Woojin whose eyes are burning holes on the muted TV. It’s been a week, he reminds himself. “I thought I could fool us to be okay by asking him to marry me.”

“F-fool us?” He stutters.

“I know that Woong hyung and I have been distant for the past months and I was thinking that if maybe I was a good actor, I could fool the two of us into believing we’re fine. Fuck,” He sighs. “I thought we would be fine if I asked him to marry me.”

Bitter laugh echoes in the living room and Jihoon knows he’s going to end up having a nightmare later from how broken Woojin sounds at the moment.

“We were falling apart, Ji.” Woojin admits, running his fingers through his hair. “We kept missing each other’s dates, we were busy and we were both stubborn about it. God, at nights, I’d close my eyes and thought if I was regretting that time.”

“That time?”

“Remember my twenty-first birthday, Jihoon?”

  
The night is young and Jihoon excitedly makes his way to the beach where Woojin and his pick up car are. Birthday traditions always are spend together the night before with only the two of them.

Tonight, he’s decided would be a little different. Instead of the usual hanging out in karaoke room, he’d surprise his best friend with a cake and a confession.

All these years, Jihoon has always been a little too in like with Park Woojin. He has to admit that, even to himself. Despite of his inhibitions about admitting it to him, he’d rather break his heart now so he can heal the next days than break himself slowly. Jihoon’s Mom did not raise him to be a coward. He’s Masan’s Park and his Dad would be ashamed if he cannot confess by now after his endless calls he’s made to rant about the younger Park.

He’d deal with it. He can dealwith it, Jihoon sighs once he’s already by the shore. 

At the back of Woojin’s pick up car is where he sits and Jihoon would lie if he says he’s not nervous about what he wants to do.

When Jihoon blinks, he’s realized that Woojin, in his simple black plain t-shirt and denim pants, is not alone. There, in front of him stands another boy.

Jeon Woong.

He’s met the other a few times since he easily made friends with all of his and Woojin’s friends. He’s the friendliest and kindest person he’s ever met. Jihoon wants to protect him at all cost.

Perhaps, that’s exactly how Park Woojin feels for Jeon Woong, too. From where Jihoon stills, he can see them wearing party hats on, a chocolate cake in between the two of them, and Woojin’s hands behind Woong’s pockets. They are too close. Noses bumping and smiles shining brightly.

Jihoon tightly holds onto the box of cake he’s holding. But Jihoon knows he should be holding onto his heart a little tighter than the box of cake in his hands.

  
“And what about it?” Jihoon distracts himself and looks away from the other.

Woojin chugs his beer and this time, faces him. “I waited for you that night, as well. But Woong hyung came to me first. I wonder what’s going to happen if you came first.”

“What the fuck does that mean.”

They are now looking at each other. This is the alcohol speaking, Jihoon reminds himself over and over again in his head. But he catches the way Woojin is stealing glances at his lips then to his eyes.

Jihoon cannot help but look at Woojin’s chapped lips and he’s always wondered how it feels like to have his lips on his own. 

For the record, they taste heaven.

👞👞

  
_This is alcohol speaking._

He reminds himself that once Woojin traps his face with his big hands. He reminds himself that when Woojin kisses him again, tongue begging for an entrance and swipes his mouth once given the permission.

  
He points out that this is alcohol speaking right now as their fingers are suddenly pulling off each other’s t-shirts. He tells himself that this is alcohol speaking as they fiddle on each other’s belts. Woojin wipes the sweat on his jaw and Jihoon shivers loudly.

Jihoon wants more more more of Park Woojin as their erections touch each others. There’s something with the way the younger has looking at him in the middle of the heated ecstasy that burns him in. 

The way the other slowly guides themselves until his back meets the couch, to the way he guides him to lie down and peppers his naked torso gives too much electricity. It’s with how at each touch of his expert tongue in every part of Jihoon’s sensitivity drives his insane.

Jihoon is drowning with everything that is Woojin.

Jihoon dies when Woojin easily slips one digit and he tries so hard to suppress the moans coming out of him with his hand but Woojin eyes him questioningly and intertwines their fingers instead.

“I want to hear all of you.” Woojin tells him.

So Jihoon gives in because with three fingers ramming right through him, he still wants more.

“More.” He begs.

Woojin stops his fingers, pulling them out, their eyes never wavering away from each others, is when Jihoon really gives in with a whine. He wants _Woojin Woojin Woojin and Woojin._

Woojin aligns his cock to Jihoon, legs dangling on the other’s shoulders and finally allows himself to be vulnerable.

_Just for tonight_.

“I love you.” Woojin whispers in betweeb his moans.

Park Jihoon hasn’t been to Heaven but with every thrust Woojin is making, Jihoon decides that Heaven cannot compare.

👞

  
Last night is not Park Jihoon’s biggest regret in his life.

For the moment he opens his eyes, without trace of what has happened, he finds Park Woojin, his own best friend in his kitchen, hair sticking out like a sparrow’s nest.

“Breakfast with me?” Woojin asks him, showing that fucking snaggletooth.

  
Jihoon gives in. He always does. For Park Woojin.

👞

  
This is how the second climax happens:

  
After That Fucked Up Night, stylized in every sense of Literally and Figuratively, Park Jihoon pretends nothing has happened. It’s where he’s good at. He’s been pretending for the past few years of his life, what’s more to coming years, right?

Wrong...

Because no matter how he erases That Fucked Up Night, he cannot. Not when every part of his apartment nor every breathing gives him a reminder of everything that happened. It’s real. It really happened.

“Park Jihoon!”

Person A better run now as A.) Person A cuts through Person B’s (Jihoon, for that matter) walking through memory lane and B.) Person A made his much needed coffee stain all over his hand.

Jihoon glares. “Ouch.” He belatedly says.

Person A aka Kim Jaehwan is now standing in front of him, eyes concerned, and hands waving near his eyes like a fool that he’s always been.

“I’ve been calling you for the past three minutes, Hoonie. Welcome to the Real World.” Jaehwan tells him, laughing his ass.

“It’s funny to you, huh, asshole.” The younger rolls his eyes at him, shaking the stains of coffee even on his polo. “Ugh, I hate you, asshole.”

Jaehwan looks at him like he’s grown two heads. “I’m promoted as your favorite asshole now. So is Woojin demoted?” The elder comments.

_Woojin…_

“Speaking of, where the fuck is Woojin? Haven’t seen him since the…. news.” Jaehwan trails off.

Neither has he, to be honest. Not since The Fucked Up Night and that’s been a week already. And The News happened two weeks ago already. How time flies fast indeed.

“Not sure, as well. It’s not like I’m my best friend’s keeper, noh?”

Jaehwan scoffs. “Aren’t you? You both are attached to the hips. Not even an angel named Jeon Woong could ever separate you apart.”

“Cause we’re the Ride or Die Bros.” 

“Bros.” Jaehwan reaffirms, nodding his head. “I wonder what Woojin would think if he sees your little secret room, huh?”

Jihoon knows it’s supposed to be just a joke but the fluster on his face says otherwise. 

“Fuck you.” Jihoon curses, taking his steps away from Jaehwan.

_Nobody is supposed to know. They are not supposed to know._

Jaehwan’s manic laughter is echoing. “Pretty sure you’d like Woojin to do that.”

  
His eyes wander around the white room. Different portraits --- colored or penciled --- are scattered on the walls and the floor.

Everything’s messy, of newspaper, of white papers, of pallets, of paint brushes, of pencils, of rulers, of his thoughts. But they’re only messy because of one person.

_Park Woojin._

He wonders how the younger would feel and react once he finds this room. He wonders if he’d been stupid or vulnerable that night.

Jihoon knows that he should be regretting everything that has happened. But he isn’t, he doesn’t. Not an ounce.

Because he realizes that he wants Park Woojin more than ever and he’s not going to let this chance slip away in front of his eyes.

  
His phone rings and he answers it with bated breath. “H-hello?”

“What.”

Jihoon runs out of the room, everything else is forgotten.

  
👞

  
The inner turmoil turns out like this:

  
“I’m sorry, you were the one he’s been trying to call.” The girl eyes him carefully and apologetically.

Jihoon gives Yoojung a sigh. “It’s fine.”

Woojin has his face planted on the table. Bottles of soju and cans of beer are everywhere. He shakes his head and taps him on his shoulders.

“Yah.”

Woojin only swats his hand, only to end up on his face. Jihoon wants to laugh but he’s trying so hard not to do it so he ends up tapping him more. Woojin looks up and smiles goofily.

“You look like my Cinderella!” Woojin points his finger at him. “But --- I don’t think my Cinderella would be here.” The whine Woojin emits is cute.

Cute but Woojin is awfully drank and Jihoon has always been the one to carry him home every single time.

“Now, who’s the Cinderella huh.” He scoffs as he scoots Woojin higher on his back. He’s heavy with all the exercises he’s been doing..

Woojin pokes his left cheek blindly and giggles. “Squishy squishy! My squishy Cinderella.”

“If I was Cinderella, why do I have to carry you all the way to your---” He puts down Woojin on his couch and huffs at him. “--- apartment. You’re so stupid, you know.”

Jihoon is about to go to the kitchen when is stopped by Woojin holding his wrist and pulling him down with him on the couch. His heart is turning crazier with each passing moment because they’re so close like this. They’re so close again like this.

And Woojin eyes him tenderly. The kind of gaze that easily melts him inside then closes the gap between their lips. 

This time, it’s soft and gentle, the way they’re giving each other time to explore each other’s caverns. Both of them are being careful and respectful and Jihoon melts and melts and continues to melt.

What stops them is the loud slam of the door from the other’s apartment. Jihoon literally jumps away from Woojin who giggles and closes his eyes.

“I regret everything that night, Jihoon. I regret everything that night.” He sighs and drifts off.

If there is anything, Jihoon feels like he’s lost a part of his life. Because he knows Woojin would regret what happened to them. Woojin has always been in love with a person that is not Jihoon.

This may be Jihoon’s love story but it doesn’t mean it has to be with Park Woojin. It doesn’t mean it has to be a happy ending.

Jihoon leaves Woojin’s apartment with a soup in his oven for the latter to heat once he’s woken up and a heart that’s been flat out broken and can never be mended again.

👞

  
The chaos perseveres like this:

  
With Jihoon seated in front of his door and loud knocks coming out from the other side of the door. It’s 12 in the morning and he knows by tomorrow, all tenants are going to go after his ass because of the noise.

Said noise yells, “Open the fuck up, Park Jihoon. You know me, I don’t give up.”

Jihoon only tightens his hold onto his legs. He’s so confused at the moment because he’s been trying so hard to avoid Woojin because Woojin is so bad for his heart but he’s here. Stubborn and determined.

“Do you want to wake the whole seventh floor, Cinderella?” He threatens. “Because you can watch me do it, Jihoon, and you know I’m not kidding.”

He hates Woojin yet once he opens the door to his apartment, his heart suddenly goes all frantic with how gorgeous he looks like as he immediately runs inside the apartment.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” Woojin tells him. “What the fuck, Jihoon, you cannot shut me out like that, I was worried sick. That was two weeks of hell.”

_Two weeks of hell cannot compare to the times I was the one in there._

“Can you just leave?” Jihoon snaps.

Woojin seems taken aback and stands his ground. “I want to know why you’re avoiding me like I’m some plague, Jihoon. I mean after ---”

_I regret everything that night, Jihoon._

“Nothing happened.” He runs his fingers through his hair, trying to sound convincing as possible. He needs to convince Woojin the most, but he knows it’s a lie. “Nothing happened, Woojin, I’m just not feeling well so could you please leave?”

“Jihoon--- listen ----”

Jihoon stomps his feet and meets his gaze directly. This time, he stops truly, as he sees the confusion and fear are written all over his face. This is new to him, Jihoon, he reminds himself.

_I regret everything that night, Jihoon._

It sounds like a broken mantra in his ears that the elder wouldn’t want to listen to anymore. Because perhaps, it might be a regret to Park Woojin, but never to him.

His hands lie on his sides, shaking as he starts to wipe the threatening tears on his eyes. “Can you please just go?”

Woojin nods, resigned to his best friend’s decision, shoulders slump as he takes hesitant steps to the door. There’s something at the back of his head to stop him --- stay and don’t go --- to heal again once more.

But he doesn’t.

The door silently closes and Jihoon stares at it dumbly with tears freely falling. It’s not the radio silence that scares him nor even the empty feeling that this apartment is crowding him. It’s the thought that he might never see Park Woojin because more than his first love, Park Woojin is his best friend.

Perhaps, this is the worst kind of heart break Park Jihoon is going to experience all his life.

👞

The get away car comes like this:

  
“Our company needs another person in the Philippines who can handle the business well.” His manager says, excitement all over his face.

Jihoon is not sure why he needs to be here, as well, as he is not entirely sure if the right person is him, he knows that their company is sending one of the best people. He’d rather be on his desk, moping and pretending to work. Or in his bed, crying his heart out.

“Park Jihoon? Jihoon?” Donghan, one of his friends at work, elbows him.

He reacts late. “Oww.”

Then, that’s when he notices that people are looking at him with expectations and he’s not really getting it. At all.

“I guess, Mr. Park is still in disbelief, but congratulations and I hope you see yourself always giving your best.”

His mouth is wide open, still not sinking but what he sees is the get away car he’s been searching to get away from this situation that he dug himself in.

It’s right in front of him and he’s not exactly sure if this is right or wrong but all he knows is that it’s suffocating and Park Jihoon needs a fresh of air.

( “Jihoon?”

He stays quiet..

“I know you’re listening, but I just want to tell you that I’m really sorry. For everything that happened between us.” A sigh escapes the other’s lips. “Not sure how it turned out like this.”

Jihoon puts his hands in front of his mouth to stop himself from sobbing.

“If I could turn back what happened, I would. I just want to have my best friend back, eh? I just want my Cinderella back.”

Jihoon dries his tears with his fists. He is no Cinderella and this is no fairy tale. There is no carriage awaiting for him nor a fairy god mother to save his ass, that’s what Jihoon is sure of.

He does not open the door. )

  
👞

The pull strikes him in the most unexpected way:

“Mom?” He asks.

His mother’s calm voice booms from the other line and he can’t help but chuckle because if anything, it’s her that Jihoon the most.

“When is my baby coming back?” She asks, cooing like he’s a five year old.

“Does my Mom miss her favorite son back?” He teases.

Mom laughs at the other line. “Don’t dare tell it to your hyung!”

Jihoon laughs at that. “I’d make sure to gloat it to him more and more when I see him.”

“Pfft.” Mom scoffs. “Have you heard, though?”

The laughter stops babbling out of his mouth. “What is it, Mom?”

“You received an invitation letter.” Jihoon rummages through his desk and there it sits. A gray envelope lying solemnly under the stacks of paper. “I’m sure you remember Jeon Woong-ssi? He’s inviting you to their wedding.”

The tears fall from his face. So Woojin got Woong hyung to say yes to him again after three years huh? That makes sense. Because in every universe, Jihoon knows that he cannot be in love with his own best friend.

“Jihoon?” His mom’s voice cuts through his thoughts.

Jihoon tries to sigh as silently as possible. “So Woong hyung’s wedding, huh?”

“It’ll be in Jeju and he sent you a plane ticket so you can’t get out of it. Baby, don’t you think three years has been too long?”

“Mom….”

Three years is not too long because comparing it to the years he spent being in love with Park Woojin is incomparable.

But this is his best friend’s wedding. How worst can it get than getting his heart crush into pieces by his own best friend, right?

👞

  
The ending continues like this:

  
A finished wedding. 

People enjoying their food in an open air reception. He meets people he’s known and shares a nod at them or two.

Jihoon is late and he wants to drag himself away as fast as possible. He needs to avoid any close encounter with Park Woojin or he’s not losing his heart but even his sanity. 

He’d rather not.

There, Woong stands in his gorgeous white tux, wearing his best smile and then --- oh --- Woojin zeroes him to the elder one with a smile, wrapping his arms around him, proud. Happy. In love.

The want to run away --- the need to disappear doubles more. This is a wrong decision, because he feels like throwing up instead. He should be happy. He must be happy for his own best friend.

Yet, all he feels is hurt hurt hurt hurt hurt. Everything aches in his body and he wants to hide under his blanket once more and forget.

So he turns around and sets to go.

“Hoon!”

“Jihoon—”

_Go away._

“Park Jihoon, stop right there!”

His feet plant on the ground. He turns around to see Jeon Woong, wearing the most gorgeous smile he’s seen. They deserve better than a friend who’s ready to throw everything away because he’s in love with his best friend and cannot, for the life of him, admit his love can never be returned.

“Hey--- hi, Woongie hyung!” Fake smile plasters on his face.

Woong chuckles, the kind of genuine which makes his stomach churn from the guilt. He hugs him but there’s only guilt and regret, remembering the nights he took a chance to be vulnerable to his now-husband.

When they separate, he says, “Congratulations to you and Woojin. I’m happy for the both of you.”

“Woojin?” Woong asks, tilting his head to the side, eyebrows raising.

“Yes, Woojin. I’m just --- genuinely happy for you and him and just --- wow, it’s here. Three years after.”

Woong laughs at him. “Jihoon ---”

Jihoon’s phone beeps and he casts a glance at it. “I hate to say but I need to go.”

“Wait, you haven’t met my ---”

_My what? My Woojin? My husband, Woojin?_

There’s next time for that. There’s next time. Park Jihoon is going to take it baby steps.

👞

The forever starts with a déjà vu:

Jihoon needs to go. Jihoon needs to leave and he’s not sure why this fucking hallway seems unending, he’s sure it only took him seconds when he’s entering the building.

No matter what it takes, Jihoon needs to go. This is making him breathless so he power walks instead. He just wants to go. He just wants to hide.

However, lady luck is never on his side because for some reason that he cannot comprehend, his left shoe gives up on him. His left shoe is open, fresh air seeping through his sock.

Mouth wide open, eyes glaring at now offending left sole of his shoe, he cannot fathom his luck. At all.

“Seriously? Of all places?” He asks, trying to breathe. “Oh my god, why? I just fucking bought you and now, really? Of all places? You could have given up on me in the airport --- or even in the cab but here? Wow, you make me speechless.”

“Is everything okay?”

_“You okay there?”_

“Per---”

_Jihoon can’t help but scoff and tries to play with his left foot. “Perfect, I must say.” He walks to his now separated sole and grimaces at it. “Guess I gotta be barefoot, huh.”_

There, he stands in his perfect black tuxedo. Traces of maturity can be seen in his face with his more chiseled jaw and cleaner cut. His hair, this time, unlike the first time he met him, is in the deepest black shade. A taunting smile is drawn on his face.

His throat feels dry.

_Get the fuck out of it together, Park fucking Jihoon_!

Jihoon bends to get the sole of his shoe and says, “Perfect.” Then he meets Woojin’s eyes. “Hi.”

The other smiles at him, the one which shows his snaggletooth and he’d be lying if he says he doesn’t miss it --- miss him. Because no matter how much he tries so hard to run the opposite side, inevitably a day would come where he is going to face his greatest fear.

And it’s standing right in front of him --- looking all glowing and dashing --- and married.

“Congratulations.” 

“For what?”

“For you know ---- getting married to Woongie hyung.”

“What ---” Woojin questions and suddenly, Jihoon watches as it dawns to him that he’s married now and oh, Jihoon also realizes that his heart is not yet done breaking. “Oh my god, Park Jihoon, you’re a stupid fool.”

“What the hell do you mean?”

Woojin walks towards him and kneels down. Jihoon panics because what if Woongie hyung sees it and “What the fuck are you doing? Don’t you have a reception to go back to?”

“Hop on, Cinderella.” Jihoon grimaces by the nickname.

Jihoon walks backwards, not really processing what the hell is happening right now so Woojin stands up and flicks on his forehead. There’s a fond smile on his face. Right there and then, Jihoon kinds of melt.

Woojin waves his fingers at him. “Can you see a wedding ring, Park Jihoon?”

_None. What._

Again, Woojin kneels and insists on him getting on his back yet Jihoon doesn’t move an inch.

“Come on, Cinderella, your carriage awaits you.”

Jihoon can’t fight the smile on his face. “Shut up.” But he jumps onto the other’s back and wraps his arms around his neck.

“I did not marry Woongie hyung, Park Jihoon.” Woojin tells him and Jihoon tries so hard not to make the stupid thump on his heart be heard by the younger. “I’ve never wanted to get back together with him since that time. Hell, thinking back I’m happy he never got to say yes to me.”

“Why.”

Woojin hoists him higher, hands under his butt. “When I said I regretted that night, Jihoon,” In this, he feels himself tense. “I meant it but not in the way you think it was. I regretted it because what if you misunderstood? Ji, my ex dumped me and here I was kissing my best friend? What if I lose you after that?”

Woojin then stops from walking, choosing to meet his eyes this time. “But then I lost you. You cut me off like it was nothing for you. When I lost you, I lost myself, as well. I couldn’t reach you --- everyone around you suddenly acted like you didn’t exist.”

“It felt like I was dying.” Woojin continues. “I should have tried harder and I regret that I didn’t. But Jihoon---”

Jihoon holds his breath at this.

“I don’t want to continue regretting the things I’ve said and things I should have done. I regretted the time I should have confessed to you on my twenty-first birthday. I regretted all the fights I made with Woong hyung just so I could have an excuse to run to you. I regretted all the times I should have told I was --- am in love with you.”

Jihoon cannot wrap his head around Woojin’s words because there are tears tears and just more tears falling from his eyes.

“The thin line between friendship and love sometimes blurred for me, Ji, and that’s so scary, because what if I hurt you? What if we couldn’t last?”

“You couldn’t decide just like that, Woojin.”

“I know.” Woojin hangs his head forward. “And I’m sorry because I should have just crossed the line.”

Jihoon jumps off and punches him on his shoulder again and again. “You couldn’t spare me the heart break, Park Woojin?”

Woojin smiles and Jihoon feels like the world is a lot brighter than it used to be as he takes his face into his hands and god, no matter how calloused they feel like, Woojin would always feel homely and safe.

“I don’t want to spend the rest of my life regretting, so please forgive this pathetic best friend of yours to be your lover, would you?”

Jihoon scoffs and punches him once more but this time, he moves forward so their lips can meet. Jihoon knows he shouldn’t be hearing fireworks but Woojin’s lips on his feels like a New Year.

“I love you.” Woojin says. “I love you and I’m going to spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”

Jihoon bumps his hip on Woojin’s and says, “Why don’t you just spend the rest of your life loving me?”

The blush on both of their cheeks are evident and Jihoon wants the ground to eat him up so he tries to power walk away from a laughing Woojin.

“Did you just ask me for marriage, Park Jihoon?” He guffaws.

Jihoon glares at him as Woojin tries to run away. This time, Park Jihoon is not letting him go as he runs after and jumps on his back, securely putting his arms around Woojin. 

Now, Jihoon knows that what he feels for Park Woojin is something unheard of or an orthodox. Because he’d cross the thin line of friendship and love over and over again if the one waiting for him is Park Woojin at the end side of it.

This feels happiness and it feels infinite and Jihoon is contented by this ending more than anything.

  
_And baby I’m so terrified of if you ever walk away_.

**Author's Note:**

> Do not HATE on Woong because Woong knows how Woojin and Jihoon feel for each other hence, he said sorry to Jihoon.
> 
> Errr I think comments are appreciated?


End file.
